bookmark_borderIt Is All In the Timing Part Minus 1

Tard Timing MP3 (Miss Kim Vocal ReMix)

by Dan n’ Kim

tard time
… kim and i…
time to tard it up
kim and dan being retarded…
on the fly and drinking 7up

Kimmy kimmy coco puff,
tard .
kind-of ruff.
… and a little tough.
she’s toaking, smoking…
a toaken of appreciation.
and, a mongaloidian celebration…

re, re, re retarding

put on the music…
you call this music…?

put on the music
let’s turn it up, up, up

dan… dan… dan the man.
if he can’t play it, no one can.

put it in the song, dude
put it in the song.
this is too much work by far.
i’m at the bar.
this is taking way too long,

you call this work?
jerk

woah, dude, i gotta work tomorrow
this is just wrong

what happened to your beer?

my beer?
you’re drinking it..
you’re a fucking trip

gooey
not too cheesy
na… she’s not sleezy

you’re not right
you’re not right

i left?

a triumphant tard time?
no this is Victory!
… just proving the point
this joint was built for tard time…
ta, ta, ta, tard time

tar, tar, tar, tard timing

tar, tar, tar, tard timing…
a mongaloidian celebration…
tards rhyming…
a mongaloidian celebration…
retardation…
a mongaloidian celebration…
retard nation…
a mongaloidian celebration…
liberation…
outside the box…
cunning fox…
a mongaloidian celebration…

ABOUT
This song concept and lyrics started… then, found themselves at the Victory Brewing Company in Downingtown, Pennsylvania, USA. From there, the tard timing machine traveled through the West Chester music scene.

Through the use of technology, the Tards bring you music made by humans using machines and tools. The entire song was created using free software found on the Internet.

Vocals
The lyrics were input into the voice synthesizer software program *Voice Mix Studio 4*
Part One of the Female Vocalist Music Software

The Beats
The beats were created using the DubStep Studio website.

DubStep Studio for the Tard Timing Song
DubStep Studio for the Tard Timing Song

bookmark_borderMajor Laser Brain Surgery

F#7 / D

I can tell by the way
You tore us apart
There’s a hole
In your heart
It’s time
For some major laser
Major laser brain surgery

It would appear
The time is near
For you to have corrective surgery

It would seem
That you are mean
… fix the tear in your heart

The black hole
That tore us apart
Try to fuse
Before we all lose

With some major laser
Major laser brain surgery

Try to repair
Under there
Where the heart
Has a tear
You ripped your heart
Apart
Why would you do
You
Why would you ever
Want to rip your heart apart?

Dear,
Now, I’m here
For some major laser
Major laser brain surgery

Is there anybody home?

Any friends and family
Should beware
Should be aware
The Damn Age
She will damage
The Damn Age
Let’s start
To fix your heart
Major laser
Major laser brain surgery

Fix the tear
In your heart

There’s something wrong with you
Fix the view
Despicable
Fix-able?

Operate
Castrate
Major laser
Major laser brain surgery
Operate
Before, it’s too late

Begin
Time to go in
Here we go
Try to fix her *know*

You’re sick
You’re ill
No goodwill

Time to repair in there
Major laser
Major laser brain surgery

by Daniel Brouse with a little inspiration from Emerson Lake and Palmer *Brain Salad Surgery”